Melvin'd/Transcript
Abridged Episode #46 Watch ← Previous Episode Next Episode → Cast (In order of appearance):Yami Bakura, Melvin, Marik, Yami, Yugi, Mr. Moseby, Cody, Zorc, Guest, Téa, Joey, Tristan, Noah, Gansley, Nesbitt, Johnson, Lector, Crump Date: January 6, 2010 Running Time: 10:00 Episode Title: Melvin'd Transcript ("Through the Fire and Flames" by Dragonforce plays) LittleKuriboh presents In Assosiation With Kroooze A LittleKuriboh Production (Yugioh Abridged Title) Episode 46 - "Melvin'd" (Yami Bakura and Melvin battling with light sabers) YAMI BAKURA: You can't win, Melvin. If you strike me down I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine. MELVIN: Bullcrap. If I strike you down you'll be as dead as Naruto the Abridged Series. YAMI BAKURA: Yes, but with me gone, you'll have my fangirls to deal with. MELVIN: Perhaps we should settle things a little more traditionally. With a children's card game! But not just any children's card game. A shadow children's card game! Ahahahahaha! YAMI BAKURA: God, is that really how I used to talk back in season one? I must've sounded like a total wanker. MARIK: Yes, you did, you sounded exactly like a wanker. YAMI BAKURA: I was being rhetorical, Marik. MARIK: A rhetorical wanker! MELVIN: But before we begin this duel to the death, I have just one question. Could I get a hug? YAMI BAKURA: I'm not going to hug you! MARIK: Maybe we should hug him, Bakura. I mean, he seems like an okay guy. YAMI BAKURA: Marik, that's your evil alter ego. He killed your father and made your life a living hell, remember? MELVIN: Hug? MARIK: I still think you should hug him. YAMI BAKURA: I'm not bloody hugging him! MELVIN: Fine! Don't hug me! It makes little difference. Once I beat you, your show will be canceled faster than you can say "created by Joss Whedon." YAMI BAKURA: I'll be damned if this show is going to be canceled before I get the screentime I was promised in my bloody contract! MELVIN: Then face me, Florence, and suffer the wrath of the Egyptian Gods! Gahahahahahahahaha! MARIK: Oh, I get it. He was implying that you wanted me to sleep with you. Ha! That IS pretty funny! After all, I'm way out of your league. YAMI BAKURA: Sod off, Marik! (Meanwhile, in the Millennium Puzzle...) YAMI: Yugi, what are you doing in my soul room? YUGI: I got bored, came to visit. Hey, do you have Nintendo in here? YAMI: Um, Yugi, this room is the manifestation of my inner turmoil. My eternal quest to unravel the truth behind my mysterious past- YUGI: So, what? You don't have Nintendo? YAMI: No, Yugi. I don't have Nintendo. YUGI: Your soul is lame! (Meanwhile, back on the blimp) MELVIN: I don't know why you're so hellbent on saving your series, Florence. After all, you could always go be on that spin-off show. What was it called again? Zorc and Pals? YAMI BAKURA: Yes, well, I'm afraid that show was already canceled a few months back. MARIK: What happened to Zorc? YAMI BAKURA: He got himself a job on a new series. The Suite Life of Zorc and Cody. (Opening sequence of The Suite Life of Zorc and Cody) MR MOSEBY: Well, it seems our hotel is being visited by a very special VIP guest. Zack, Cody, I want you both on your best behavior. CODY: Don't worry, Mr. Moseby! We promise we won't do anything baaaaaad! ZORC: That's right! We'll be good little boys! CODY: Come on, Zorc! Let's go play a practical joke on that VIP guest Mr. Moseby was talking about! ZORC: Hooray! I love practical jokes! CODY: Okay! When he comes around the corner we jump out and scare him! ZORC: Got it! CODY: Wait for it... Now! GUEST: Oh my God, I'm burning! Ahhh! ZORC: Hooray! I love practical jokes! CODY: Holy sh**. I think he's dead. ZORC: Stay tuned for our cameo on Hannah Montana! (Cut to Hannah Montana) CODY: Holy sh**. I think she's dead. (Back on the blimp) MARIK: Hey, hey, Bakura, guess who I am. *in a ghostly voice* Ooh, Bakura, you must believe in the heart of the cards because I am the Pharaoh! Ooh! YAMI BAKURA: Yes, Marik. Very amusing... MARIK: *ghostly voice* Ooh! Yugi, you must summon the Celtic Guardian! The fate of the world depends on it! YAMI BAKURA: Thank you Marik, that's quite enough alre- MARIK: *ghostly voice* The Celtic Guardian, Yugi! It is your destiny! YAMI BAKURA: Uh, sometimes I wonder which Marik I despise more... MELVIN: Hug? YAMI BAKURA: NO HUG! MARIK: *ghostly voice* Yugi, you should totally hug him! YAMI BAKURA: SHUT UP! PLEASE, BOTH OF YOU JUST SHUT UP! (Inside the blimp) TÉA: Yugi, I just woke up in Bakura's room and he- YUGI: Whoa, whoa, back up! You were sleeping in Bakura's room? And, here I thought you had class Téa! *cough-laugh* Actually that's a lie, I never thought that. TÉA: Yugi, this is serious! Bakura's missing! YUGI: And you woke me up because...? TÉA: It means his room is free! We can totally party in there! YUGI: Damn skippy we can! (On top of the blimp) MELVIN: And now Mega Ultra Chicken, ARISE from your grave! MARIK: Stay on target! YAMI BAKURA: Oh, bollocks... MARIK: Stay on target! YAMI BAKURA: I believe we're royally screwed. MARIK: STAY ON FREAKIN' TARGET! YAMI BAKURA: What could I possibly use to defeat an Egyptian God card? MARIK: *more ghostly voice* Ooh! The Celtic Guardian, Yugi! Ooh! YAMI BAKURA: I DON'T HAVE THE BLOODY CELTIC GUARDIAN! HOW THE BLOODY HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO USE A BLOODY CARD I DON'T BLOODY HAVE! AND EVEN IF I DID BLOODY HAVE IT, HOW WOULD IT WORK AGAINST THE BLOODY EGYPTIAN GOD?! MARIK: *ghostly voice!* Because the fate of the world depends on it, aibou! YAMI BAKURA: What the bloody hell does aibou mean? MARIK: I think it's Japanese for gay. MELVIN: If you're done fighting with your girlfriend we have a card game to finish. YAMI BAKURA: He's not my girlfriend! MARIK: You tell him, honey! MELVIN: Now I shall use Mega-Ultra Chicken's secret ability that I just this second made up to convert my life points into attack points, merging me with the beast itself! Prepare yourselves to become part of Internet obscurity! Say hi to the Juggernaut from me! MARIK: Don't worry, Bakura! This is the part where Yugi shows up and saves everybody from certain damnation...! Any minute now! (Inside the blimp) JOEY AND TRISTAN: PARTY TIME! YUGI: You know Téa, I can't help but think I should be doing something very important right now. TÉA: Yeah, it's called making out, preferably with me. (Back on the blimp) MARIK: Huh. YAMI BAKURA: So much for that. Still, it was a good show while it lasted. Remember that one time when I said, "I don't care"? Hilarious! MARIK: Yeah. I suppose there's only one thing left to do. YAMI BAKURA: Right. (Music for the song, "Stand by Me", begins) YAMI BAKURA: Do-do-do do. Do-do-do do. Do-do-do do. Do-do-do do. Do-do-do do. Do-do-do do. Do-do-do do. Do-do-do do. (and continues) MARIK: When the night has come, and the land is dark, and the mo-oo-on is the only light we'll see. No, I won't be afraid, no, I won't be afraid, just so lo-oo-ong as you stand, stand by me. And Bakura, Bakura, stand, by me. Oh, sta-aa-and, by me. Oh oh, stand by me, stand by me... MELVIN: Hear that, Florence? That's the sound of the fourth wall, collapsing! Any final remarks before your series concludes? YAMI BAKURA: Just the one. Tell my fangirls, I love them. MELVIN: Ahahahahaha! Hey, LittleKuriboh, where's the new episode? Ahahahahahahahahaha! (Back inside the blimp) (Ghost Nappa is playing in the background) YUGI: Téa, did you hear something just now? TÉA: The only thing I can hear is the sound of you NOT making out with me! YUGI: I don't know, it sounded kinda like our show being- (static) (Credits appear and scroll) MARIK: If the sky that we look upon, should tumble and fall, and the mounta-aa-ins should crumble to the sea. I won't cry, I won't cry, no, I won't shed a tear, just as lo-oo-ong, as you sta-aand, stand by me. And Bakura, Bakura, stand, by me. Oh, stand, by me. Woah oh, stand, stand by me, stand by me. (Lyrics switch to "Beautiful Girls" by Sean Kingston) You're way too beautiful, girls. That's why it'll never work, you'll have me suicidal, suicidal... (At Noah's base) NOAH(Played by Kirbopher): Gentlemen, everything is going forward as planned. Now that Yu-Gi-Oh! Abridged has been canceled, we can proceed with phase two: the complete and total domination of the world-wide media network by 4Kids Entertainment! But first, we must decide how to deal with Yugi and his friends. GANSLEY(played by GanXingba): Death by drowning! NESBITT(MasakoX): Death by robots! JOHNSON(Kaiser Neko): Death by justice! LECTOR(Lanipator): Death by bad publicity! CRUMP(Takahata 101): Death by penguins! NOAH: Hmm. All of these are very good ideas, good ideas indeed except for yours Crump, that was dumb and so are you. CRUMP: Oow. NOAH: But I have something even better in mind. Hehehe, who is the green-haired rich spoiled brat screwing the rules now, Seto? NOAH AND BIG FIVE: Hahahahahahahaha! CRUMP: Penguins. you in season three Trivia (so far) *The Big 5's "death by" gag represents each of their respective Deck Masters, Deepsea Warrior, Robotic Knight, Judge Man, Jinzo, and Nightmare Penguin. * 'Aibou' is actually japanese for 'partner'. This is how Yami Yugi calls Yugi in the japanese version of the anime and manga. *During the last scene when Noah was talking to the Big 5, there are 4Kids shows playing in the background. These shows are Sonic X, Viva Pinata, Dinosaur King, and Chaotic.